Ponderings of an Elect Exile

focused on {Everyday, Backyard} Glory

2012-01-25T19:14:00.003-06:00

No special story for today's focused on Glory post. Just some beautiful Eurasian Collared Doves in our backyard on a random day this past week. I'm amazed at the glimpses of God's glory that are there to be seen every time our back door is opened. I love the fact that even during weeks when I'm not able to go searching for God's glory with my lens, it's still there all around me.

Be sure to see Tauna's focused on Glory post here. She has a wonderful subject this week! :)

focused on Glory...Better Late Than Never!

2012-01-16T07:35:00.000-06:00

So tomorrow it will be time for a new focused on Glory post, and I am just now posting for last week. It's been one of those weeks around here...actually, it's been six (and a half!) of them. :) I started to just skip this week...since I usually begin to hone in on the following week's post over the weekend...but decided that since my goal is 52 weeks, and I've already missed one, I needed to go ahead and post back-to-back.

I had a post planned for last week using photos that are on my phone. I'm a dinosaur, you have to understand...I don't have a smart phone, I don't use my phone for anything other than talking and setting my alarm every night. :) I thought I could get the photos from phone to computer via the usb cord that came with the phone...but apparently not. At least not in a manner simple enough for me to figure out. :)

Then Katie played "His Eye is on the Sparrow" during yesterday's "quiet music" time at church. As I was sitting there, I was thinking about how much sparrows have come to mean to me over the last year or so as I have been observing/photographing them, and I decided I wanted to try to get some new sparrow photos for {another} sparrow post. :) I never get tired of them!

So yesterday afternoon, Billy and I went out to soak in the warm sun in the backyard for a while, and I set out to get some new sparrow shots. Little did I know the surprise waiting for me! I was just bemoaning the shot I had missed of a red-breasted woodpecker, (I LOVE woodpeckers, and I've managed to "just miss" this one three times lately), when I glanced up and saw a lone sparrow perched in the tree. As I focused my zoom on it, I saw a tiny splash of yellow...yellow stripes on the top of his head.

We had recently caught several glimpses of a white crowned sparrow, which has distinctive stripes on the top of its head, but the yellow markings were new to us. Upon later study, we discovered that this was a white-throated sparrow, a variety neither Billy nor I had seen before.

He hung around the yard long enough for me to take several photos, disappearing (along with the 50 or so house sparrows that had been keeping him company) when the huge hawk that has been hanging around our house swooped through and ended our bird-watching/photographing for the afternoon. (I didn't get a shot of the hawk, either...he keeps eluding me, but I am determined to capture him [photographically :)] one of these days!)

Our Sunday School lesson yesterday was on Psalm 139...the value of each human to God, and thus the value they should have to us. We talked about God creating us all differently, and not only making each one of us different, but having a special, individualized plan for each one of us, set in motion before we were even created! As I thought about sparrows yesterday while Katie was playing, and the things God has shown me through them, I thought how perfectly that all went along with that morning's lesson.

Sparrows are such a common bird...one of the most common birds in North America...and definitely the most common bird in our yard. There are times when there may be hundreds of sparrows in our little yard all at the same time. Apparently they were pretty common in Bible times, too...Luke 12:6 says that they were sold two for a penny. And yet...every sparrow is different. No two of them look the same. And Luke 12:6 also says that "not one of them is forgotten by God". He then goes on to say in verse 7 "you are worth more than many sparrows".

Jesus used a lowly, common sparrow to teach an important lesson. Matthew 10:29 words it this way: "Are not two sparrows sold for a penny? Yet not one of them will fall to the ground outside your Father’s care."

How much more does He care for us? And what a glimpse of His glory...to see that the God of the universe not only created the lowly sparrows, and made each on different, but that He also cares about them, not allowing a single one to fall to the ground without His notice. What a huge, incredible, unfathomable God we have, that in the midst of controlling the entire universe...He notices each little sparrow fall.

Be sure to see Tauna's focused on Glory post this week at Creative Confetti.

Jenny...A Needed Reminder...

2012-01-15T07:50:00.003-06:00

I'm way behind on blog posts...had hoped to get caught up this weekend, and then our internet has been down most of two days, which didn't help. :) I have plans for new posts soon, but Jenny Mc has been on my mind as I've prepared for today's Sunday School lesson, and I thought perhaps today would be a good day for a repost from the archives. For more of Jenny's story, see Mr. James's article from the October, 1982, Moody Monthly magazine here.

Here's my post from August 28, 2007...

"Under the banner of God, victory is always assured; but apart from it, defeat is a certainty. When the banner of God's rod was not held high, Amalek prevailed.
You can't do battle against the flesh under your own power."

~ Kay Arthur ~
Lord, I Want to Know

Loni at Finding Joy in the Morning is hosting In Other Words today, and she has selected this quote from Kay Arthur. God seems to be reminding me of this truth everywhere I turn lately...probably because, like the children of Israel, I keep forgetting it. The verse this quote references is Exodus 17:15..."The Lord is My Banner."

I am reminded by this of a lesson God taught me in a very powerful way years ago. Close friends had a daughter who was born blind and profoundly retarded. Jenny was almost my age, but never walked, talked, or even took care of any of her own needs. She was completely dependent upon the care of others. Although her needs eventually forced them to place her in a state facility, her parents were completely committed to caring for her as much as they were able. Almost never did a day go by that her family did not visit, reading the Bible to her, singing to her, massaging her limbs, and talking to her about any and everything. Their love for her was evident to everyone who knew them.

Her parents were an example to everyone around them. Strong, committed Christians, they were used by God to witness to many unbelievers and to encourage many believers. They were like family to us, and they taught me many things, through example and words, that still impact me today.

When I was about 16, though, God very suddenly used Jenny herself to make a huge impact on my life. I was struggling with something...I'm not even sure what at this point. I was also dealing with a lot of stress from trying to manage school, church commitments (lots of them), a hectic babysitting schedule, and family responsibilities. I remember sitting at my desk one morning during my quiet time expressing my frustration to God because I just *couldn't do it*. I was tired of failing. I was tired of missing the mark. And suddenly God brought Jenny to mind.

He reminded me of all the people whose lives Jenny had touched. He reminded me of all the people her parents had influenced, and of the testimony of her father, one of the godliest men I know, about the way that God used Jenny's birth to bring him to Himself. He gently showed me that Jenny's life had had more impact than most people ever dream of having...and yet she had never uttered a word, taken a step, or written a sentence. I realized in a whole new way the truth of 2 Cor. 12:10:

2 Corinthians 12:10
That is why, for Christ's sake, I delight in weaknesses, in insults, in hardships, in persecutions, in difficulties. For when I am weak, then I am strong.

I realized that day that Jenny was exactly where God wanted me to be....completely dependent. God began teaching me that day that He was able to use Jenny so mightily because she didn't get in the way of what He wanted to do in and through her. He reminded me through her that when I try to do things *on my own*, I am simply getting in His way. Only when I am completely dependent on Him am I useful to Him, and only then can He do His work through me. Just as He used Jenny's family and the staff at the Center to meet her needs, He brings people into my life to help meet my needs (as Aaron and Hur lifted up Moses' arms in Exodus 17). And just as He used Jenny's parents and the staff to meet those needs, He wants me to be available to lift up the arms of others when they need it. But most of all, He wants me to be completely dependent on Him.

I needed to be reminded of this again this week. Once again, I have struggled with feelings of failure...feeling as though no matter how hard I try, I can't *get it together*. Once again, God is reminding me that *He* is my banner...that as this quote says, victory is only assured through Him, and when I try to do it on my own, I am assured only of defeat. When I start to feel failure overtaking me, I need to get back under His banner.

For more thoughts on this quote, visit Loni at Finding Joy in the Morning. Also...for a real blessing, a dose of encouragement, some good laughs, and maybe a few tears, visit one of my favorite websites. James McAlister, or *Mr. James*, is Jenny's dad, and for a number of years, he has written a much-loved newspaper column. This site archives many of his newspaper articles and other items of interest. ( This one , this one, and this one
are *especially special* to me...they are about my parents. :) You might want to grab a kleenex before reading, though.) There is much good reading there...take some time to browse his site...I think you'll be glad you did!

ETA: Loni's blog can now be found here.

focused on Glory...Unexpected Winter Beauty

2011-12-29T08:30:00.002-06:00

I know that God didn't give us beautiful weather last weekend just for my birthday, but it was a welcome gift regardless! Friday, Saturday, and Sunday were beautiful, with mild temperatures (we even hit the low 70s for a while!), gorgeous sunshine, and a touch of wind. It felt more like spring than New Year's weekend!

We took advantage of the beautiful weather to spend some time outside...both during my birthday outing on Friday, and at home in our yard throughout the weekend. The beautiful weather...and the creatures enjoying it with us...were wonderful reminders of God's creativity, goodness, and definitely His glory!

Our yard was full of young mourning doves this weekend...they fascinate me!

They are beginning to lose that look of "armor" in their feathers, but there is still a touch of that.

There were four doves clustered in this tree.

Loved these two in the tree together...

Squirrel on the roof.

Beautiful sunshine!

Horrid picture, but the way these guys balance in the trees amazes me! He looks like he should be toppling forward out of f this branch, but he's perfectly balanced, munching away. :)

Be sure to see Tauna's focused on Glory post here. What a precious story!

Addendum to last week's foG post:

Somehow between the spacing/formatting/photo issues I was having with Blogger last week and the two girls who were bouncing around waiting to watch a movie with me, I completely lost a {very important} paragraph of last week's foG post. I'm going to try to recompose it here. :)

From last night's post...

"Mrs. Shirley was the mother-in-law/mother/grandmother of dear friends. She was a very special lady to our children, and she and I had a bit of a special relationship as well...we were choir buddies for a few years when she first joined our church and sang in choir until she was no longer able, and then I stayed with her once a week or so during her last year. God used her in a big way in my life. "

What was supposed to follow that was this...(or something close :))...

"Not only did God use my relationship with Mrs. Shirley in a big way in my life, but He also used my front row seat in watching my friend Jodie take care of her mother-in-law. I'm no stranger to the world of caring for aging family at home. I lived with my grandmother for several years to enable her to stay independent as long as possible, and then my parents cared for her for several years both before and after her stroke(s). But caring for Mrs. Shirley came with its own set of challenges, and watching the way that God sustained and enabled my friend to meet those challenges made a huge impact on my life."

focused on {eternal} Glory...

2011-12-28T19:08:00.002-06:00

This week's post is a simple one...photos of the beautiful casket spray from our friend Mrs. Shirley's funeral last week. She loved red roses and cardinals, and this arrangement ended up being just perfect. Since we love cardinals around here, too, I had to go back out yesterday and take a few pictures of these.

Mrs. Shirley was the mother-in-law/mother/grandmother of dear friends. She was a very special lady to our children, and she and I had a bit of a special relationship as well...we were choir buddies for a few years when she first joined our church and sang in choir until she was no longer able, and then I stayed with her once a week or so during her last year. God used her in a big way in my life.

At her funeral and graveside service, we were reminded of the certain hope that lies within us...

But we do not want you to be uninformed, brothers, about those who are asleep, that you may not grieve as others do who have no hope. For since we believe that Jesus died and rose again, even so, through Jesus, God will bring with him those who have fallen asleep. For this we declare to you by a word from the Lord, that we who are alive, who are left until the coming of the Lord, will not precede those who have fallen asleep. For the Lord himself will descend from heaven with a cry of command, with the voice of an archangel, and with the sound of the trumpet of God. And the dead in Christ will rise first. Then we who are alive, who are left, will be caught up together with them in the clouds to meet the Lord in the air, and so we will always be with the Lord. Therefore encourage one another with these words.

1 Thessalonians 4:13-18

"For behold, I create new heavens and a new earth,
and the former things shall not be remembered
or brought to mind."
~Isaiah 65:17

Bro. Kent also talked a little bit about Heaven, and reminded us of this description in Revelation 21...

"And He carried me away in the Spirit to a great, high mountain, and showed me the holy city Jerusalem coming down out of heaven from God, having the glory of God, its radiance like a most rare jewel, like a jasper, clear as crystal.

It had a great, high wall, with twelve gates, and at the gates twelve angels, and on the gates the names of the twelve tribes of the sons of Israel were inscribed— on the east three gates, on the north three gates, on the south three gates, and on the west three gates.

And the wall of the city had twelve foundations, and on them were the twelve names of the twelve apostles of the Lamb.

And the one who spoke with me had a measuring rod of gold to measure the city and its gates and walls.

The city lies foursquare, its length the same as its width. And He measured the city with His rod, 12,000 stadia. Its length and width and height are equal. He also measured its wall, 144 cubits by human measurement, which is also an angel's measurement.

The wall was built of jasper, while the city was pure gold, like clear glass.

The foundations of the wall of the city were adorned with every kind of jewel. The first was jasper, the second sapphire, the third agate, the fourth emerald, the fifth onyx, the sixth carnelian, the seventh chrysolite, the eighth beryl, the ninth topaz, the tenth chrysoprase, the eleventh jacinth, the twelfth amethyst.

And the twelve gates were twelve pearls, each of the gates made of a single pearl, and the street of the city was pure gold, like transparent glass.

And I saw no temple in the city, for its temple is the Lord God the Almighty and the Lamb.

And the city has no need of sun or moon to shine on it, for the glory of God gives it light, and its lamp is the Lamb.

By its light will the nations walk, and the kings of the earth will bring their glory into it, and its gates will never be shut by day—and there will be no night there. They will bring into it the glory and the honor of the nations.

But nothing unclean will ever enter it, nor anyone who does what is detestable or false, but only those who are written in the Lamb's book of life."

Revelation 21:10-27

Talk about focused on Glory! To think that the city is going to be that beautiful and that glorious...and yet the truly amazing thing is going to be the Glory of God. Such an incredibly awesome thought!

Be sure to see Tauna's foG post here. I love her post this week...she definitely decorates her world! :)

(I apologize for missing last week's foG post completely, and being late with this week's. Last Tuesday was the funeral, and the day completely got away from me. The following day brought some unwelcome excitement that has carried on throughout the week...more about that in tomorrow's post, if all goes as planned. But...the point is that photography and blogging have been rather on the back burner. Hopefully we're back on schedule now and I will do better! ETA: I also apologize for the spacing/formatting issues with this post. I've been working on it off and on all day, and Blogger and I are apparently not on very good terms today, because no matter WHAT I do, I can't seem to fix the problems. Ugh! :))

End of the Year Daybook :)

2011-12-26T10:51:00.002-06:00

I haven't done a Simple Woman's Daybook post in a long time, but I got up this morning in the mood for an "End of the Year Daybook" post, so here it is. :)

December 26, 2011
Outside my window...Cold, cloudy, gray day with rain in the forecast. The birds and squirrels are having a feast on the old air conditioner outside my window...since it no longer works, but we can't remove it, we've turned it into a bird feeder. They make a huge racket out there, but I love it. :)

I am thinking...On the brink of the New Year, this verse about the ultimate in "new" has been on my mind since last Tuesday:

“For behold, I create new heavens

and a new earth,

and the former things shall not be remembered

or come into mind." ~ Isaiah 65:17

Bro. Kent said last week at Mrs. Shirley's graveside that we always think about people in Heaven thinking about things that happened on earth, but that actually the Bible says that in Heaven we won't remember things that happened on earth. I've been pondering that all week...what a comforting thought on so many levels!

I am thankful...for all the blessings and lessons of this holiday season, for a healthy family, for daily provision, and for the encouragement of friends in so many ways in recent weeks.

From the learning rooms...Planning and preparing for second semester!

In the kitchen...Making a big pot of potato soup for lunch. Glad to have leftover treats from yesterday...cookie dough bites, cherry-pistachio bark, and oreo truffles (except I actually sent the last remaining oreo truffles with Billy to work...there weren't many. :))

I am wearing...Warm, cozy fleece and new fuzzy slippers I got for Christmas...for which I am VERY thankful this cold morning.

I am creating...plans and schedules for the new year. Billy is on week 2 of his 3 weeks working his "intermediate" schedule...transitioning from his former schedule of 6:30-2:30 to his new schedule of 11-7. I'm not even sure what these weeks officially are...8-4, maybe? Should be interesting...we start back to school January 2 and will need to adjust our schedule for the "intermediate" hours for one week, then start our 11-7 schedule the following week. Apparently we needed some work on flexibility!

I am going...to venture out sometime today or tomorrow into the post-holiday chaos. Children have Christmas money they are aching to spend, and I have a couple of returns (blech! :)).

I am pondering...a blog post I've been planning since Thanksgiving and still not composed/posted. God is still working on it...and on me!...but I'm hoping to finish it this week.

I am reading...Katie Davis's Kisses from Katie. Haven't had time to read much, but I can already tell it is going on my "Favorites of 2011" list. Wow. If it weren't on loan from a friend, I think I'd be underlining half the book. :) Bedtime reading these days (when I'm not too tired to hold a book by the time I collapse into bed) is Mary DeMuth's The Muir House. I hope to review it soon. Can't wait for her newest book to come out later this month...Beautiful Battle.

I am hoping...for a very low-key week this week, with no surprises. We've had a little too much excitement the last couple of months. :) Really hoping to just have a relaxing, productive week this week.

I am looking forward to...2012! After my favorite week of the year, of course. :) (See below...:))

I am hearing...Listening to Guy Penrod's "Breathe Deep" CD on my wmp playlist, in honor of the GP shirts the girls got for Christmas (Guess who those were from?? :))

The girls LOVE their Guy Penrod shirts! "Pray About Everything" is Gracie's favorite song. Someday I need to video her singing it. :)

Around the house...Enjoying our new-to-us Christmas Day surprise sofa! Friends called Christmas morning and said that they had bought a new sofa, and could we use their old one? So we added a little furniture moving to our Christmas afternoon plans. So thankful!

Going to be doing some serious decluttering and organizing this week (and maybe even a little painting?? I am afraid to get my hopes up, but maybe. :) Sure would be nice to get the dining room done...or even half-done!...for my birthday. :))

One of my favorite things...(from my Daybook post this time 2 years ago :))...One of my favorite things~ this week between Christmas and New Year's! It's always been my favorite week of the year. That probably started due to my birthday falling on the 31st, but now I love it because it has a different "flavor" than any other week of the year. There is still a lingering of the beauty of Christmas, with a continuation of holiday spirit due to the coming New Year's celebration. The shopping, cooking, and preparation deadlines of Christmas are over, and it is usually a "slow" week commitment-wise. And what a week for a "planner/list-maker", as goals and plans for the new year are being created!

A few plans for the rest of the week: SO thankful for an empty calendar this week. No mid-week church activities, even...which will be really weird, but for which I am thankful after the hustle and bustle (much of which wasn't even holiday related) of recent weeks. Homekeeping, cooking, planning/scheduling/school prep, a few errands here and there, relaxing time with family and friends, and hopefully a little crafting and photography...those are my plans, but we'll see what actually happens. :)

Here is picture I am sharing...

Silly picture of the kids when we were attempting to get some Christmas pictures...hopefully we'll get some better pictures sometime this week!

Linking up with the Simple Woman's Daybook today...visit Peggy to see more!

Merry Christmas from the Harrises!

2011-12-25T09:04:00.000-06:00

Oven-Free Friday...on Saturday :)

2011-12-24T08:30:00.000-06:00

Nothing like deciding to start a new weekly feature and then abandoning it entirely for a couple of months! I started Oven-Free Fridays in October, got caught up in 30 Days of Gratitude in November, and then December went crazy and I've barely blogged at all. (In fact, I still have a post pending from the "30 Days" series, and I still haven't posted my "focused on Glory" post for this week. :-/ ) BUT...I do want to get back to the Oven-Free Fridays feature, so here is my "jumping back in" post. :)

One of the things that has been an adjustment without an oven has been desserts and snacks. Cookies, pies, cakes, brownies...all of these typically require an oven. I have plans to try some variations with the crock pot, toaster oven, and electric roaster, but I haven't gotten very far with those plans as of yet. I have, however, found some truly "oven-free" alternatives this year that have been hits around our house.

For the first, I have to give credit to my friend Valerie. She sent this Cherry-Pistachio bark to our youth Christmas party last week, and I was hooked! I was even more excited when I discovered how quick and easy it is to make. I will add these three comments to the linked recipe:

(1) I don't have a 15x10 pan. I've been making it in an 11x16 pan and using foil to make "bumpers" in the pan to make the space smaller. I realized when I made it yesterday that I think I would prefer it a little thinner, so next time I make it, I'm going to do away with the foil "bumpers" and let it spread out over the whole pan.

(2) I noticed in the comments that someone said that when they stirred the cherries and pistachios into the white chocolate, the colors all ran together. I liked the idea of the Christmas-y red, white, and green, so I spread the white chocolate in the pan, then sprinkled the cherries and pistachios over the white chocolate. Then I used the back of a spatula to gently press the cherries and pistachios down into the chocolate, so that they weren't "sitting" on top. (My son would probably want me to mention that that was his idea. He is a smart boy. :))

(3) I can't get this to cut in anything remotely resembling "squares". I use a big knife to cut it apart, but it ends up in all kinds of shapes. This doesn't bother me a bit. If you are the kind of person who wants perfect squares...well, be warned that you may have trouble. :)

Yummm! :)

The second recipe is one I found on Pinterest. I've planned to make it for weeks...since before Thanksgiving, I think...and never made it. Yesterday as we were preparing for a party, I thought, "I'm going to try those Cookie Dough Bites for tonight." (I was taking other food, so if they'd been a complete flop, it wouldn't have been a disaster, and this is the kind of party where you can do that sort of thing. I wouldn't ordinarily plan to take something I'd never tried before to a party. :))

One of the things we've missed most about being "ovenless" has been cookies. We've done some of the ready-to-bake cookies in the toaster oven, but you can't really do a big batch of baking that way. When I saw these cookie dough bites, I thought, "What a perfect cookie substitute!" Everyone always wants to eat the dough anyway, and although I've eaten raw cookie dough all my life and am still alive to tell about it, as a mom, I feel this responsibility to tell my children "That has raw egg! It could make you sick!" (They do still eat raw cookie dough occasionally, in small amounts. It's one of those things I feel guilty about regardless...guilty for depriving them of the joys of raw cookie dough on the one hand, and guilty for letting them eat something so "dangerous" on the other. ;-) Oh, the joys of being a mom! :))

These cookie dough bites solve that problem. They are eggless. All the yumminess, none of the guilt. Yay! And easy...I decided to make them at the last minute, had everything I needed on hand, and even managed to drizzle chocolate on top on my way out the door. :)

Again, my comments on the linked recipe...

(1) Even with my hands, I couldn't get the dough to stick together. I added a tiny bit of water, and it worked fine.

(2) I didn't have mini-chips, so I used regular ones. If I'd had time, I would have gotten out my kitchen hammer and crushed them in a ziploc bag first...but I didn't, so I just threw them in "as is". They worked just fine that way, and since I always have a big bag of chocolate chips from Sam's in my freezer, we'll probably continue to make them that way.

More yummm! :)

Do you have a favorite oven-free treat? Please post any recipes or links in the comments section...I'd love to hear from you!

In "Other" Words ~ Year-Round Christmas

2011-12-20T09:29:00.000-06:00

Christmas belongs to us, the believers of Christ,

It doesn't belong to the world.

Christ needs to be elevated in our hearts year around.

He didn't come to be marketed, as a seasonal gift on sale for half price.

We were the ones that were bought at a price.

~ David Jeremiah

Christmas is in 5 days. I am woefully unprepared. Our tree stands in the living room, fully lit but barely decorated...over a week ago I told the children, "two ornaments apiece, and we'll finish it tomorrow..." Or maybe a few days after tomorrow...*blush*

I bought my first Christmas gifts yesterday...thank goodness for Amazon and free SuperSaver shipping! Hopefully today I will cross a few more off the list...I so want to be finished BEFORE Christmas Eve.

I realized yesterday that I need a new "plan" for Christmas brunch...or breakfast, as it will need to be this year, due to Sunday morning church. For various reasons, our traditional brunch fare won't work this year, so it's time to get creative quick.

And speaking of realizations, I realized in the wee hours this morning that I completely, totally FORGOT about our standing Christmas Eve tradition...the one package we open on Christmas Eve...just left it off the list entirely. Realized entirely too late, as the Christmas budget is already past the point of last minute additions...a last-minute "what do I do now?" pickle that I seriously wish I had avoided.

I had a list of Christmas crafts, ornaments, and gifts I really wanted to tackle with the children this year...I still hold out hope of accomplishing a *few* things off that list, but given the schedule for the week, it won't be nearly as many as I'd hoped.

I'm reminding myself that considering the events of the last couple of months, I've actually done pretty well. It isn't as though I've just been lollygagging. :) Since the first of November I've had a couple of humdinger illnesses, one of which landed me in the ER, and both of which required some serious "down time" in order not to put myself even *further* behind. And then there were the few days of electrical issues, which threw several kinks into our plans. Amazingly, we made it through all the Christmas music at church (with all the associated extra rehearsals) pretty much without missing a beat. They were wonderful, and a treasured part of our family Christmas traditions with our church family, but they definitely take a huge chunk of our schedule during holiday prep time.

And again today, as with so many Christmas seasons in recent years, we have a funeral to attend. As we've been preparing for today, my mind has gone back to spending Christmas Eve at the funeral home 13 years ago after Granny Kitty died...to Daddy's funeral the day after the Christmas musical in 2004...and spending my birthday at the funeral home last year when Great-Papa died. (Was that just last year? Or two years ago? The years seem to be running together...) This year dear friends lost their mother/mother-in-law/grandmother. She had been on hospice for 9 months and had her ups and downs, and yet...no one really expected it to happen now.

As jarring as funeral homes and funerals and loss and grieving seem against the backdrop of the festivities of the holiday season, I am reminded again, as my friend said the other day, that this is what Christmas is all about. While the grim reality of death seems so out of place in the midst of the season of joy and gladness...it's really what the joy and gladness are all about.

I remember walking the mall on Christmas Eve 13 years ago, shopping for earrings in which to bury my grandmother. There weren't any suitable earrings from her collection which matched the suit in which she was to be buried, so with my mom and aunt busy with other details, I volunteered for earring duty.

It was hard not to be sad walking through the mall that afternoon. Christmas sweaters and Santa hats and funny reindeer antler headbands were everywhere. There were clusters of happy shoppers with armloads of bags overflowing with gifts. Of course, there were also the grumpy scrooge-type shoppers...the ones who complained about long lines, empty shelves, and crowded aisles. I felt like such an out-of-place observer, distanced from the holiday frivolity by my somber mission.

Just as I found myself fighting tears, remembering many happy trips to that very mall with my grandmother in her healthier "shop-til-you-drop" days, realization dawned. While I felt that the purpose of my trip was decidedly "un-Christmas-y", in reality, it pointed to the real meaning of Christmas in a way that the Christmas sweaters, reindeer antlers, and Santa hats couldn't begin to.

God reminded me as I wove through the crowds that day of a truth I saw more clearly than I ever had before...a truth I had heard, and read, and said for years, but which I was actually experiencing in a whole new way. The death that had propelled me to the mall, the grieving that I was experiencing as I walked along...they, not the holly and glitter of the holidays...they were truly the point.

I realized that many of those happy shoppers I was passing might be experiencing the holiday spirit, but completely missing out on the Spirit of the holiday. Although we were experiencing sadness in the fact that my grandmother wouldn't be there to celebrate Christmas, we had an amazing joy and certain hope in the knowledge that she was now worshiping her Savior face to face, and that we would see her again someday. As our friend Jeanette Cox said, "This may be your worst Christmas ever, but it's her BEST one." I've remembered that often this week.

Decorated trees, holiday baking, beautifully wrapped gifts, family traditions...they are all wonderful parts of our Christmas celebration. But as God keeps reminding me this year...they aren't the point. They are fun, special, precious extras that hopefully help remind us, our families, and our friends of the true gift of Christmas. But they aren't Christmas.

Christmas is, as the quote above points out, all about OUR being bought...not on sale, but at the highest price imaginable. And not as a last-minute fix to an unexpected problem, but as part of a divinely perfect plan from before the foundation of the world. God created us KNOWING that we would sin, KNOWING that we would need a Savior, and PLANNING to send His one and only Son, fully God and yet fully man, to come to earth and die...for sinful, selfish, evil us. The gift of Christmas is a year-round gift of hope and peace and joy found in salvation through faith in Jesus Christ, His death on the cross to pay for our sin, and His glorious resurrection.

I'm reminding myself this year that I need to let go of all the other stuff of Christmas, and focus on that truth. The greatest gift I can give my family is not Christmas Eve pajamas, traditional brunch food every year, or a beautifully decorated tree. The greatest gift I can give my family is to live out the year-round reality of Christmas every day, and to spend the Christmas season reminding them of that year-round reality in all that we do. (Conversely, the worst thing I can do is get stressed and grumpy because Christmas isn't looking like I think it should or wish it would...not that I would ever do that...*whistles in the air*. I still have a blog post pending from Thanksgiving about God using a friend to "sharpen" me a bit in that regard...God is still working on me!)

Thanks to Karen for hosting In "Other" Words this week. Please visit her blog to see what she and others have to say about the above quote she selected for today.

P.S....Just as I was finishing this post, Billy called and said my Christmas Eve gift crisis had been solved. God is good, always, and I am thankful!

focused on Glory...Moon

2011-12-13T22:24:00.001-06:00

Almost a week had passed since our first focused on Glory post, and I was not much better off than I was the week before in the way of photos. The infection that had landed me in the ER the previous week was a doozy, and my camera hadn't been in hand nearly as often as usual. When it was, the photos I took were quite uninspired. I was beginning to get a bit antsy about the upcoming focused on Glory post.

Then as we pulled up at the house after Sunday night's second and final performance of this year's Keyboards at Christmas, I saw it: a HUGE bird flew over the van and the house into our back yard. Its underside was totally white against the hauntingly dark night sky. "What was THAT?" I asked Billy. "An owl...a HUGE owl," he replied.

We raced into the house and out the back door, reminding the children not to let the dogs out in the yard. I just knew this was going to be the solution to my lack of photos for this week's focused on Glory post...what could be better than a big, beautiful owl in a tree?

We saw it, sitting regally in the top of the tree across the alley. As dark on the outside as its underside had been light, it was still quite visible high in the tree against the dark sky. Alas...what was visible to the naked eye was too much of a challenge for my photographic skills...the combination of distance, zoom lens, darkness of the sky, and darkness of the amazing bird were just too much. As I frantically changed settings over and over, trying to come up with *something* that would work, the giant bird suddenly took flight and disappeared.

There is nothing quite like the devastation of knowing that you have missed an incredible photo opportunity. I stood in the yard with eyes peeled for the massive owl, repeatedly asking Billy, "Do you think it will come back??" He tried to console me, but we both knew it was probably gone for the night, if not forever.

As I searched the dark sky for the elusive owl, I began to notice something else that I'd been looking right past...the moon. I had really wanted to get up and take pictures of the eclipse Saturday morning, but that was not to be. As I looked at the moon, and the clouds and trees that framed it, I decided that I might have missed the photo opportunity I had dashed out the door for, but I had another one in the sky right over my head.

Be sure to see Tauna's focused on Glory post here. (And don't miss the delightful story behind it here!)

I Heart Faces...Pets

2011-12-13T17:42:00.002-06:00

This week I Heart Faces is all about pet faces! Here's the blurb..."This week is all about the animals that we love and adore! Enter a photo of an animal (doesn’t have to be furry – any type of pet, animal, insect, bird, snake, etc. is fine). "

This is Apollonia. Apollonia is very definitely a pet. If we go out in the yard without food for her, she runs up to us and follows us around until we go in and get something for her. She takes food out of our hands. She is seriously spoiled. :) I especially love this photo of her from earlier today because you can see her cute little tongue. <3

Be sure to check back later this evening for this week's focused on Glory post!

Remembering Seven Years Ago...

2011-12-09T20:07:00.001-06:00

Remembering seven years ago...

missing dress rehearsal, friends helping in so many ways,
Isaiah 40:11,

Diet Coke in a bag,

half the choir showing up at the hospital when dress rehearsal ended,

just the right people being there at just the right times,

watching every breath and wondering if it was the last...

until it was, and all the suffering was over,

and we were left with a great big husband/daddy/father-in-law/Papaw-sized hole in our hearts.

So thankful for these years he's spent rejoicing and worshiping instead of suffering, and for the certain hope that that night seven years ago was not good-bye. Almost the last words I heard him say, in the midst of incredible pain, were "God has been so good to me." So thankful for that memory that challenges me when I get caught up in earthly stuff and forget to see His goodness...

So thankful for my Daddy...

...and missing him an awful lot tonight...

Not exactly according to plan...

2011-12-06T21:22:00.001-06:00

"I may end up cheating on the first FOG post tomorrow..." was the message that popped into my chat window yesterday. "I may have to as well..." was my reply. Not an especially auspicious start for our new joint blog venture!

Just hours after I posted our announcement post last Thursday, I found myself in the ER, thanks to a sudden and severe infection that totally derailed the rest of the week. Thanks to some heavy-hitting meds and lots of mandatory rest, I am finally beginning to feel something akin to normal. However, all my plans for a photo-filled weekend fell completely flat. No Christmas card pictures, no birthday photos of our oldest, no Keyboards at Christmas photos, no nothing! I did take a few backyard bird photos, but my arm wasn't steady enough to get anything approaching a great shot.

Poor Tauna didn't even get her camera out during that time. She was hit hard by a nasty bout of bronchitis and ended up in bed all weekend.

As Tauna suggested, it almost seems as if Satan is working overtime to discourage us from focusing on God's glory and sharing it in this way. Not going to work, though! :) I may not have the photos I intended to have, or even anything close, but I'm going to use what I have and share regardless.

I don't know if Thursday night was the sickest I've ever been, but if it wasn't, it was certainly in the running. But God worked in that time in such a precious way...He showed His faithfulness and glory in the cold (quite literally, as I was shaking with chills), sterile (well, until the poor paramedic bumped a syringe and shot blood all over the exam room...yes, it was a fun night for all :)), and sometimes lonely (Billy was bouncing back and forth trying to take care of me and checking on the kids) ER room just as greatly as He shows it in a gorgeous waterfall or in the amazing view off a mountaintop.

I posted this on Facebook on Friday...

I have the best husband, the best children, and the best friends anywhere. And I am so very, very thankful for them. And thankful for our ever-faithful God, and for His Word, which is a comfort and help in any situation. I was also reminded in the wee hours of the morning how thankful I am for Marie K's parents, Steve and Heber M, who encouraged not only me, but our family and our church, in systematic Scripture memory for many years, and for my parents, who made that a priority. We tend to think that it's just in case we ever end up persecuted and have our Bibles taken away, but sometimes it's just a simple matter of not having a Bible available when we really need one, or not being in a position to read one if we had it. There are a lot of things I can't quote verbatim, but it is such a blessing to be able to meditate on what I do remember when I can't pull out a Bible and read it.

I am so thankful for all the ways God showed His faithfulness and glory that night. One of the biggest ways was through my sweet husband. I posted this on Facebook later on Friday...

I have to go back and say how thankful I am for my husband. He worked 10 1/2 hours yesterday, came home and went to the Living Nativity with us, and then spent 5 hours in the ER (where he'd worked all day) with his sick wife. He came home and slept for not-quite-two hours, got up and ran a bunch of errands that I couldn't do (and brought home warm, fuzzy socks for me!), did laundry, and then went to the store to help me get the essentials since it's two-week grocery day and there was no way that was happening. All without complaining at all. I am so blessed and thankful (and more than a bit spoiled).

I am very blessed (and yes, spoiled :)). I am so thankful to have a husband who shows the love of Christ for the church in his love and care for me and for our children. His birthday happens to be tomorrow. :) So even though this is not really the type of photo I had in mind for this feature...it's actually just a snapshot from a quick birthday dinner tonight (because of church tomorrow)...I decided it was an appropriate one for this "not according to plan" "focused on Glory" feature.

I'll work on more creative, technically correct photos for the coming weeks. :) In the meantime, here's a quick bonus I did take this morning. Not a great shot for all kinds of reasons...particularly some irritating purple fringing I've been dealing with lately (I'm not sure why that has suddenly become an issue, but if anyone has any suggestions, please let me know!)....but there was something about this shot that I loved, with all it's imperfections, so I did a little playing in PSE and decided it was a keeper. I am more amazed all the time at God's glory shown in these feathered creatures. The more I watch and photograph them, the more they fascinate me. Today was a gray and dreary day, and the tiny bursts of color of the cardinals in the trees were definitely glimpses of God's glory.

Be sure to visit Tauna's "focused on Glory" post as well...her Haiti photos first caused me to fall in love with her photography, and she shares a few of them in today's post.

Announcing...

2011-12-01T17:01:00.001-06:00

The time has come. I promised something exciting coming up on the blog, and it's time to make the big announcement. :) Well, two of us are excited, anyway, and we hope you will be, too! Here it is, in both our words...

From Tauna:

Aperture, ISO, white balance, metering, filters, actions- it’s easy to get bogged down in the mechanics of photography, especially if you are still learning. As much as I love photography, and learning how to make beautiful images, I often feel overwhelmed with trying to get everything just right- usually to little avail. Rarely does a shot come out with the crispness, or effect I hope for. That’s not to say I want to give up, I know I will get there someday.

But if my entire aim is on getting that just right, artsy, stunning shot, then maybe I need to take a breather. Perhaps I need to pay more attention to my focus. No, not the cross-hairs in my viewfinder, but the pinpoint of my attention.

My fabulous friend Jennifer proposed a 52 week project that hopefully will sharpen our focus. She and I are going to try to capture a hint of God’s glory through our lenses. We want to concentrate more on composure than exposure, wonder over white balance, and interest instead of ISO.

That’s not to say we are going to throw what bits we know out the window. And we aren’t going to set everything on AUTO. What it means is that we are hoping to find our shots through a God filter. We want to be focused on Glory.

To tell you the truth, Jennifer is a beautiful photographer. You can see the evidence on her blog Ponderings of an Elect Exile. I've told her a few times that her wildlife photos remind me of Thase Daniel. I love seeing what she is able to capture.

If you want to catch our glimpses of glory, join us each Tuesday on our individual blogs as we post our pictures for the week. I can’t wait to see what He shows us.

~ Tauna

From Jennifer:

A while back, an idea began brewing in the back of my mind. I love photography. But some days I love it more than others. There are days that I find myself rather frustrated at the lack of progress I'm making in the technical aspects. There are days that I'm actually going backward rather than forward. And there are days I think I just need to put my camera away and be done with it completely.

Those days don't happen all that often, but lately I've had a few more of them than usual. I've learned that the best antidote for those days is to take my camera out and shoot something I love to shoot...something I don't have to pose or direct...something that gets me back to the "why" I'm doing this photography thing in the first place.

The "something", more often than not, is the birds and squirrels in our yard. A session or two shooting our resident wildlife usually gets me back in a better frame of mind and reminds me of the "why"...why I love photography anyway, and what my goal is in walking around with this thing strapped around my neck all the time. :)

There are actually many reasons I love photography, and more than one goal in my shutter-clicking. But I've realized over the past year or so that the major "why" behind my photography is this...I want to be able to capture a little glimpse of God's glory through my lens. Whether photographing nature, people/relationships, or events, I want to show God's glory through my photos. Even in capturing our family memories in photos, I want to leave a heritage for our children to remind them of the work God has done and is doing in our family "from the first day until now".

So...back to my idea, and our announcement. :) After one of those, "I need to pack up my camera and be done with it" bouts recently, I thought about advice I'd seen from more than one photographer I admire. Over and over I have read that one of the best things you can do to improve your photography and prevent burnout is to get involved in a 365 or 52 project....a photograph every day or week for a year. I don't tend to do well with those things, and I didn't know of any groups starting soon, but I really liked the idea, and began to ponder starting a personal 365 or 52 project on my blog.

I worried, though, that I needed accountability. Unlike my "Oven-Free Friday" feature, which I'm still planning to continue, but which has been on hiatus for the last few weeks, I wanted to be consistent with this. I needed someone to prod me and motivate me a bit. And then during a chat session one night, the thought hit me that I needed a partner in this venture. And who better than my friend Tauna? She is an incredibly talented photographer. She is one of the most creative people I know. She has a really cool blog called Creative Confetti. AND...she has recently opened an Etsy shop, where you will find these adorable little doo-dads...(perfect for Christmas presents for the girls and ladies on your list! :))

To make a long story a tiny bit shorter, we are teaming up to bring you "focused on Glory", a weekly joint blog feature which will appear every Tuesday on both Creative Confetti and Ponderings of an Elect Exile. We will each share our favorite "glimpse of God's glory through the lens" from the week before, and perhaps share a bit of the story behind the photo.

So...visit us on Tuesday for our first "focused on Glory" post!

~ Jennifer

(Super-special thanks to Tauna for the cool blog button for our new feature. She's designed a whole set, which we'll be rotating through the weeks...keep an eye out!)

30 Days of Gratitude + 1 ~ Happy Birthday, Peter!

2011-12-01T15:03:00.001-06:00

Yes, I still have some backlogged 30 Days of Gratitude posts to finish...

Yes, I still have a list of posts I was planning before the 30 Days started...

Yes, there is an exciting announcement coming later tonight...

But first and most importantly...it's time for a birthday post!

Fourteen years ago today, I became a mother.

14!?!?

I could post about the 36 hours of back labor with no epidural.

I could post about my mom not believing Billy when he walked out and said "It's a boy!" (We didn't find out what we were having ahead of time.) She had to go into the room and see for herself because Billy had joked for months that he was going to go out and announce, "It's a beagle!" {*Rolling eyes*}

I could post all kinds of mushy mom stuff, but he'd rather I didn't. :) I will say that I am extremely thankful for this boy of mine...and I'm excited about the journey God is taking him on from boy to man.

He's not fond of the camera these days...occasionally he'll let me take a shot or two, but my "current" photos are rather limited. I'm hoping for a "birthday photo" shoot this weekend, so hopefully I'll come back and post a few of those soon.

In the meantime, here's a look back over the last 14 years...

I love this of Peter and Bayley...<3

Peter looking very serious as the Penguin Poacher at Emlyn's birthday party a few months ago. :)

Day 29 ~ A Kingdom That Cannot be Shaken

2011-11-29T09:39:00.001-06:00

(Yes, I still have posts to come for days 25-28...started, in draft, just haven't had time and clarity to finish them! Also planning to post an IOW post later today, and looking forward to a fun announcement on Thursday! Stay tuned...:))

Day 24 ~ His Goodness and Steadfast Love ~

2011-11-24T06:36:00.000-06:00

On this Thanksgiving, I am most of all thankful for the goodness and steadfast love of our amazing God...love and goodness that not only provided for salvation, but that also sustains through every moment.

Make a joyful noise to the LORD, all the earth!

Serve the LORD with gladness!

Come into His presence with singing!

Know that the LORD, He is God!

It is He who made us, and we are His;

we are His people, and the sheep of His pasture.

Enter His gates with thanksgiving,

and His courts with praise!

Give thanks to Him; bless His name!

For the LORD is good;

His steadfast love endures forever,

and His faithfulness to all generations.

~ Psalm 100

Day 23 and Wordless Wednesday ~ Birds

2011-11-23T05:00:00.000-06:00

Linking to Wordless Wednesday today.

Day 22 ~ Certain Hope

2011-11-22T21:53:00.001-06:00

I was reminded tonight how thankful I am for these words...

But we do not want you to be uninformed, brothers, about those who are asleep, that you may not grieve as others do who have no hope. For since we believe that Jesus died and rose again, even so, through Jesus, God will bring with him those who have fallen asleep. For this we declare to you by a word from the Lord, that we who are alive, who are left until the coming of the Lord, will not precede those who have fallen asleep. For the Lord himself will descend from heaven with a cry of command, with the voice of an archangel, and with the sound of the trumpet of God. And the dead in Christ will rise first. Then we who are alive, who are left, will be caught up together with them in the clouds to meet the Lord in the air, and so we will always be with the Lord. Therefore encourage one another with these words. ~1 Thessalonians 4:13-18

Not One...

2011-11-21T20:10:00.001-06:00

Day 21 ~ He Watches Me...

2011-11-21T12:33:00.001-06:00

Day 20 ~ My Sunday School class :)

2011-11-21T08:48:00.001-06:00

Meant to come home last night and finish Saturday's not-quite-finished post and do this one as well...but instead, I came home and went to bed early...Gracie wanted some reading time with Mommy after a busy weekend, and then I did some reading of my own...:)

But yesterday I was reminded again how thankful I am for my Sunday School class. Several weeks ago, Bro. Kent preached about spiritual gifts and knowing our calling. One of the questions that he asked during that sermon was "What is burning in your bones that you have to do for God?" For years I "filled a spot" teaching in the bed babies class...I enjoyed it, I was meeting a need, but it was not my calling...it was definitely not a "burning in your bones" thing. I knew that I loved teaching youth and adults...the times that I have taught youth and/or adults either at church or in my career over the years have been the most fulfilling times of all. So when God opened the opportunity for me to teach the youth girls in Sunday School, I was thrilled. And when Bro. Kent asked the question about the "burning in your bones"...I knew just what he was talking about! That is exactly how I feel about teaching this class.

I told the girls once again yesterday...God seems to always bring just the lesson that I need to *learn* every week as I prepare to teach. I love the lessons, I love the preparation, and most of all, I love the girls! They bless me in so many ways every week. I love our discussion times during class, I love the insights that they come up with and the questions they ask. I love the looks on their faces when they see something in a verse or passage that has never hit them that way before. I wish we had more time to delve into things each week...we almost never have time to actually *finish* our lesson...but I'm trying to learn to put that time crunch in God's hands and trust that He will help us cover what He wants us to cover, and that He can do the work He has to do in us even when our time is short!

I am so thankful for the opportunity to teach this class, and to be involved in our youth department. I'm thankful for our youth leadership, and our church staff, and the fact that our youth department is far from a "typical" youth program. I'm thankful for my two youth (although I'm still trying to figure out how my kids were all "little kids" just yesterday and now I have two in the youth department!), and for the opportunity for them to be involved in this ministry. And I'm so thankful for all "my girls" and the opportunity that God has given me to be part of their lives during this time.

30 Days of Gratitude ~ Day 19 ~ Homeschool Group

2011-11-19T14:07:00.001-06:00

Day 19 ~ I'm thankful for our homeschool group. We've been members of the same support group since Peter was in kindergarten. We've had years when we were very active...we participated in co-op classes for many years and served on the board as activity directors for four years. Then we've had years like the last few...when we've hit a field trip here, a mom's Renew there, and yearly testing with the group.

This past week I was able to attend a mom's Renew meeting for the first time in many months. It was good to see long-time friends from the group and have a time of fellowship and fun Christmas crafting. I was reminded what a blessing this group has been over the years to me and to our family...not only in the obvious of the planned activities of the group...co-op, field trips, conferences, mom's meetings, etc....but in less "official", but still very important, ways. They've prayed faithfully with and for us during some of the hardest days of our lives...my dad's last few months when he was so ill and the 6 weeks of Ammah Grace's NICU stay. We were still on the board when we faced our biggest crisis ever, and while we weren't able to share all the details at that time, we shared what we could with the rest of the board, and we were so thankful for their prayers at a time when we were limited in asking for the prayer we so needed.

So thankful for our group and the good memories, good friends, and support and encouragement that have come with it...enjoying the times we're able to participate now, and looking forward to being more active again in a future season when life allows...

Day 18 ~ Change

2011-11-18T10:47:00.001-06:00

Day 18...Super-busy day here, not much time for blogging, but I ran across this post yesterday and it went along so well with things I've been thinking lately that I decided it was time for a re-post.

I am thankful for change. I don't like change...but I am thankful for God's changing work in His people...in me! I am thankful that He NEVER changes, but that He is patient and merciful in His work of change in my life. And I am so thankful for the people in my life who have hung in there through all the changes in my life in the last 7 years. It's sometimes hard to watch someone we love go through major changes, not only in life, but in the very core of who they are. I'm thankful for those who have continued to love and pray for and listen and laugh and cry with me no matter how hard it got. Many thoughts on this this morning...all week, actually, but no time...so here's a repost from February of this year...

Never the Same...

“I will never be the same again,

I can never return, I’ve closed the door.

I will walk the path, I’ll run the race

And I will never be the same again.”

~ lyrics by Geoff Bullock ~

"You will never be the same person you were before this happened. That's not entirely a bad thing. God has done things in my life through the circumstances of the last few years that I don't know that He could have done any other way. Those have been good changes. But I am not and will never be the same person I was before...none of us are."

Just a few days ago, I said those words to a friend going through a life-altering "storm of life". I ached for the experience she shared with me...very different from the trauma that began in our family 4 1/2 years ago...and yet with so many of the same feelings and emotions.

I usually look ahead to see what the Tuesday In "Other" Words quote is going to be, but last week I got busy and didn't get that far. This afternoon when I saw the above quote, I was taken back to last week's conversation...and then taken back much further, to seven years ago this week.

When I think back to the changes that began 4 1/2 years ago, I am always reminded that the changes really began a couple of years before that. February of 2004, to be exact. It was actually seven years ago Thursday that I uttered the "famous last {and theologically incorrect} words" about which I've shared before:

"I know God won't give us more than we can handle, but I have told Him this week that I am there."

The next evening I was in the back of an ambulance being rushed to Little Rock in a snowstorm because my water had broken at 30 weeks. Three days later, Ammah Grace was born.

I've said before that in those first few days of February of 2004, I had no idea we were in the last days of "normal" as we knew it...ever. Ammah Grace's birth...the NICU stay and my separation from the rest of the family...the fear of losing a child...and the miracles God worked in her healing...changed me forever. I am forever a different person, a different wife and mom than I was before.

Just as we were breathing a sigh of relief and settling in to enjoy life with our healthy, blessedly normal little girl, my dad's health spiraled downward. A few months later, he entered Heaven and saw Jesus face to face, while I began a grieving process that would overwhelm the next 18 months of my life. Again...life would never be the same for this "Daddy's girl". God taught me much through those days...and again, changed me in ways that probably couldn't have been accomplished any other way.

More "famous last words" in late June of 2006, as I told a friend I felt as though we were finally entering a "new normal"...and finally leaving the overwhelming grief behind. Just a few days later, the world completely exploded, making the previous 2 1/2 years seem like a picnic. As I said in this post about that time..."It would take a book to even begin to tell the story of the last 4 1/2 years. The important part is...God has worked and is continuing to work in our family in amazing ways. He has taught us things through this that we could never have imagined. "

More than any of the other experiences, the trauma that we discovered July 2, 2006, changed me forever. I am not and will never be the same wife, the same mom, the same daughter, the same friend, the same person I was before. It changed every member of our family forever, particularly two of our precious children. The changes certainly weren't pleasant, and some of them weren't very pretty. I don't trust people much anymore. I tend to go into "panic mode" when my children are out of my eyesight in public...especially the girls. (Peter is now taller than me, so I'm not so worried about someone grabbing him and taking off as I am the rest of them. :))

There were somewhat "temporary" changes, too...in areas in which I am beginning to get "back to {somewhat} normal now. My true smile comes much easier now than it did a few years ago. I rarely have days when I feel like I'm going to have a panic attack walking into a room of people I know in a social setting or at church. I realized not long ago, when a long-time friend I hadn't seen in years remarked on my children having some of "their mother's transparency", that my "transparency" was one of the things that disappeared completely for a while....but God is slowly bringing it back. There are areas in which I almost recognize the "7 Years Ago Me" in my 2011 self.

But, as I shared with my friend last week, the "permanent" changes haven't been all bad...or even mostly so. God has worked in my life...and in the lives of everyone in our family...through these circumstances in ways I could never have imagined. Most of all, He has brought me to an intimacy with Him that I don't think would ever have happened any other way.

God is in the business of change. His plan is for us to constantly be being transformed...being changed into the image of His Son. If I am still the same person I was 10 years ago, or one year ago, or even last week...then something is wrong. I remember hearing at one point years ago that if we leave a worship service without something in us being changed...we haven't really worshiped. Our daily encounters with Christ should be changing us day unto day...maybe not in the dramatic ways we are changed through life's mega-storms, but changed, continually, nonetheless.

I am so thankful that even though God's plan is to continually change me, He never changes. No matter the changes in my life, my heart, or my circumstances, I can rest in the sure certainty that He is the same yesterday, today, and forever. I will never be the same, but He always is!

And we all, with unveiled face, beholding the glory of the Lord, are being transformed into the same image from one degree of glory to another. For this comes from the Lord who is the Spirit.

2 Corinthians 3:18-19

And do not be conformed to this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind, so that you may prove what the will of God is, that which is good and acceptable and perfect.

~Romans 12:2

For I the LORD do not change; therefore you, O children of Jacob, are not consumed.

~Malachi 3:6

Jesus Christ is the same yesterday and today and forever.

~Hebrews 13:8

Day 17 ~ World Prematurity Day

2011-11-17T22:26:00.001-06:00

I actually had another post planned for today's 30 Days of Gratitude post, but I discovered that today is World Prematurity Day, and I decided I couldn't let it go by without some mention.

I'm thankful for our 30 week preemie who is now a bright, healthy, active almost-8-year-old. (Yes, I said 8. How in the world did THAT happen?? :)) All babies are miracles, but she is one of those who reminds us of that even more than usual. Six weeks in NICU, all kinds of dire predictions, many, many prayers by people literally all over the world...and since the day she left NICU, she's been completely healthy and normal in every way. We serve an amazing God!

So many who read my blog have heard Ammah Grace's story over and over, but for those who haven't, you can read more here, here, and here.

I'm thankful for all of my children, but on this World Prematurity Day, I'm thankful for our not-so-little-anymore preemie who reminds us daily that we serve a mighty God of miracles, and for the wonders too many to declare that He has given us in her story...

I waited patiently for the LORD;
   H turned to me and heard my cry.
He lifted me out of the slimy pit,
   out of the mud and mire;
He set my feet on a rock
   and gave me a firm place to stand.
He put a new song in my mouth,
   a hymn of praise to our God.
Many will see and fear
   and put their trust in the LORD.
  Blessed is the man
   who makes the LORD his trust,
who does not look to the proud,
   to those who turn aside to false gods.
Many, O LORD my God,
   are the wonders you have done.
The things you planned for us
   no one can recount to you;
were I to speak and tell of them,
   they would be too many to declare.
~ Psalm 40:1-5

Wordless Wednesday and Day 16 ~ Fall

2011-11-16T22:11:00.001-06:00

30 Days of Gratitude...Fall...

Joining with Wordless Wednesday.

In "Other" Words, and Day 15

2011-11-16T08:00:00.001-06:00

Day 15 ~ I'm thankful for the scars...thankful for the deep wounds through which I've seen God's glory in ways I could never have imagined.

I actually started this post on Tuesday, but didn't quite get around to finishing it. :) Anyway, I ran across this quote on Tuesday morning, shared by Scotty Smith:

"In my deepest wound I saw your glory, and it dazzled me." ~ St. Augustine

I immediately decided that Day 15's 30 Days of Gratitude post would be based on that quote. Then I popped over to see what this week's IOW quote was, and discovered this quote by one of my favorite missionary heroes...

“ No wound? No scar?
Yet as the Master shall the servant be,
And pierced are the feet that follow Me;
But thine are whole. Can he have followed far
Who has no wound nor scar? ”

~ Amy Carmichael

Through the wounds that we've experienced in recent years, I've realized that the deeper the wound, the more God has shown His glory in it, and the more amazed I've been by that glory. I love Augustine's wording "...it dazzled me." What an amazing thing to realize that the glory we are seeing now is just a glimpse...that as much as it is dazzling in its brilliance now, it is only a foretaste of what we will see one day!

I've struggled recently with a bit of a paradox in my life, however. I know the truth of Augustine's statement, I have seen in my own life the incredible revelation of His glory in the wounds...and yet I desperately want to avoid that which would bring further wounds or scars into my life or the lives of my family. I fight a constant {and often losing} battle with fear of further suffering or pain.

I'm not talking about being cautious and careful and protective of our children. I believe we have a responsibility to do all that we can to protect our children, and I certainly don't believe we should go searching for suffering. I'm talking about those situations in which we know that God has called us to a particular task which we know will lead us out of our comfort zone, or perhaps invite ridicule or criticism, or require sacrifice. I'm also talking about those vague feelings of fear and dread about the future...about the unknown or imagined that is to come that could be unpleasant or downright earth-shattering.

God calls us to follow Him. He has told us that there will be suffering...sometimes great suffering...along the way. He has also promised that He will never leave us or forsake us, and that if we share in His sufferings, we will also share in His glory. He has shown us that firsthand, over and over, in the events of the last 7+ years. He has proven His faithfulness over and over. And yet there is still the struggle...

God has given me such a strong longing for our family...each one of us...to follow Him with all of our hearts. We can't follow Him wholeheartedly if we are afraid of pain and suffering...if we are focused on the fear of wounds and scars, our eyes cannot be focused on Him. I'm thankful for the glory He has shown in the wounds, and I am thankful for His faithfulness which has never wavered. I'm thankful that He continues to teach me and draw me even in the times I want to run from suffering, despite all He has already taught me.

...that I may know him and the power of his resurrection, and may share his sufferings, becoming like him in his death...
(Philippians 3:10)

For as we share abundantly in Christ's sufferings, so through Christ we share abundantly in comfort too.

(2 Corinthians 1:5)

Beloved, do not be surprised at the fiery trial when it comes upon you to test you, as though something strange were happening to you. But rejoice insofar as you share Christ’s sufferings, that you may also rejoice and be glad when his glory is revealed.

(1 Peter 4:12-13)

The Spirit himself bears witness with our spirit that we are children of God, and if children, then heirs—heirs of God and fellow heirs with Christ, provided we suffer with him in order that we may also be glorified with him. For I consider that the sufferings of this present time are not worth comparing with the glory that is to be revealed to us. For the creation waits with eager longing for the revealing of the sons of God. For the creation was subjected to futility, not willingly, but because of him who subjected it, in hope that the creation itself will be set free from its bondage to corruption and obtain the freedom of the glory of the children of God. For we know that the whole creation has been groaning together in the pains of childbirth until now. And not only the creation, but we ourselves, who have the firstfruits of the Spirit, groan inwardly as we wait eagerly for adoption as sons, the redemption of our bodies. For in this hope we were saved. Now hope that is seen is not hope. For who hopes for what he sees? But if we hope for what we do not see, we wait for it with patience.

(Romans 8:16-25)

Thanks to Nina for hosting In "Other" Words this week. Please visit her blog to see what others are sharing about this week's quote!

I Heart Faces ~ Autumn Splendor

2011-11-15T20:12:00.001-06:00

This week's I Heart Faces challenge is "autumn splendor". I took a LOT of foliage pictures last week on our trip to Petit Jean, but this was one of my favorites. Ammah Grace is following Mom and Bayley's footsteps with a fascination for photography, and Bayley let her borrow her camera to take some pictures on one of our hikes. She was SO serious about her pictures....totally caught up in the images she was capturing on the camera... <3

30 Days of Gratitude ~ Days 9-14 (Backtracking :))

2011-11-15T08:34:00.001-06:00

Backtracking now to catch up...again...on my 30 Days of Gratitude posts. We went out of town for a couple of days, and the posts I'd plan to schedule before we left didn't get done...and then since we've been home, I've been dealing with pain issues that have interfered with my best-laid plans. Hopefully I'll get caught up today and stay on track the last half the month!

Day 9 ~ Thankful for God's plans that are always better than ours. We'd had a trip planned for months, but have had to change our plans more than once in the last few weeks...and then again at the last minute, we had to cancel our plans for Tuesday and not leave until Wednesday. Then it stormed...all day...hard...Tuesday...right along the path we would have been traveling. So thankful for protection and reason for thanksgiving even in the midst of disappointment!

Day 10 ~ Thankful for a much-needed getaway to Petit Jean for a few days. We all needed this trip, and the weather and the park were beautiful! More on our trip soon...but for now, a couple of preview pics...:)

Day 11 ~ Veterans' Day ~ Thankful today for those past and present who have sacrificed in so many ways for our freedom....especially friends whose families are separated right now due to deployment. They are true heroes!

Day 12 ~ My grandparents! November 12 would have been my Granny Marks's 100th birthday. She's been gone 15 years, and I still miss her terribly. What I would give now for some of her fried chicken, or turkey and dressing, or homemade pimento cheese, or even her perfectly cooked scrambled eggs. And chocolate cake. Yum. (I'm getting really hungry all of the sudden!) She gave me a love for "little things" (which seems to have passed on to my Emlyn in her genes :)), for pens and paper, for papercrafting, and for journals, among other things. She loved her birds, and would be so happy that Billy and I are now taking care of the birds in what used to be her yard.

I am thankful for all of my grandparents and the impact they had on my life.

Christmas at Granny Marks's ~ 1971?

Thanksgiving 1971 ~ Nobody cooked turkey and dressing better than Granny Marks!

Granny with her first grandchild (me :)) ~ January 1969

Day 13 ~ As we are now into our second week without a dryer, I am thankful for all of the appliances/conveniences I so often take for granted. For hot and cold running water, for all kinds of appliances to keep food cold and make food hot when needed. For indoor plumbing! For telephones, computers, and even a cell phone. For a washer and {most of the time!} dryer. :) For fans in the summer {and fall, this year :)} and heaters in the winter. For cars so that we don't have to walk everywhere we go. So thankful for all these things that are such a luxury to so much of the world. (P.S....We have a new-to-us dryer as of Monday, for which we are VERY thankful!)

Day 14 ~ Although we are enjoying Billy's vacation right now, and wish it could last longer, I am reminded how thankful I am for his job. He's been in his current position 6 years today, and with the hospital itself for over 15 years. I'm thankful for the ways God has provided through this job all these years, and I'm thankful that he has a job in the current economy and job market, as we pray for many who are job-hunting right now.

Every good gift and every perfect gift is from above, and comes down from the Father of lights, with whom is no variableness, neither shadow of turning. ~James 1:17

30 Days of Gratitude ~ Day 8 ~ Godly parents

2011-11-09T05:42:00.002-06:00

I'm so thankful for the blessing of Godly parents, who loved, nurtured, taught, and sacrificed for us in so many ways. I'm thankful for their 44 years of marriage, and their example of faithfulness through good times and many very hard ones. I'm thankful for their example in seeking the Lord first in everything, and trusting Him no matter how difficult things got. The greatest blessing a child can have is Godly parents...and I am so thankful for that blessing.

30 Days of Gratitude ~ Days 4 and 5 ~ Catching Up :)

2011-11-08T20:48:00.002-06:00

Busy days, these days of November! I'm determined to get caught up on my 30 Days of Gratitude, though. These are going to be short...I'm taking a quick break from the remains of a LONG todo list that needs to be finished before I go to sleep...:)

Day 4...I'm thankful for my husband. I am so thankful for his desire to be a Godly husband and father, for his hard work to provide for us, for all the ways he spoils us, for the ways he picks up my slack when I'm not up to par physically. So thankful for the almost-16 years that we've had!

Day 5...I'm thankful for our four amazing, healthy, creative, {sometimes crazy} children. The "I'm going to pull my hair out until I look like Billy" days notwithstanding, they are such a blessing in so many ways. I love watching them develop in wisdom and stature, in character, and in personality. I can't wait to see the plans God has for each one of them!

30 Days of Gratitude ~ Day 7 ~ The Cross

2011-11-08T04:57:00.003-06:00

Before The Cross

My Savior’s sacrifice paid for all my sin

So in my suffering I look to the cross again

No need, no want, no trial, no pain

Can compare to this

The wrath of God, once meant for me

Was all spent on Him

Before the Cross,

I humbly bow

I place my trust in the Savior

Your finished work captures my gaze

You bore the wrath, I know the grace

In my darkest hour, Your presence is my peace

In my days of joy, Your grace carries me

Jesus, my Great High Priest

The One who pleads for me

My heart is filled with faith in You

Here at Calvary on my knees

Before the Cross, I humbly bow

I place my trust in the Savior

Your finished work captures my gaze

You bore the wrath, I know the grace

~John Payne

30 Days of Gratitude ~ Day 6

2011-11-06T20:54:00.001-06:00

I know...I'm behind. I will try to catch up on the two days I'm missing tomorrow. I somehow thought this weekend was going to be calm and peaceful. Suffice it to say, I was wrong about that. For tonight, I'll keep it simple. I'm thankful for this little guy (girl?) who showed up in our backyard tonight. We haven't seen any of our owls in a long time. This one almost looks like our "original" owl...I have no idea if that is even possible, but I hope it sticks around! I'm thankful for God's amazing creativity...He could have created one kind of bird (or none!), but He created over 10,000 species! I'm especially thankful for owls...and for this one that made my heart smile at the end of a rough day...

30 Days of Gratitude ~ Day 3 ~ God's Sovereignty

2011-11-04T22:21:00.001-05:00

I'm still behind...I had hoped to finish this this morning and do "today's" post tonight, but it's not going to happen. Maybe I'll catch up tomorrow. :)

This truly is yesterday's post, though. Yesterday morning I woke up feeling kind of like an order of Waffle House hash browns..."scattered and smothered". Not were there some {relatively minor, by comparison} things hanging over me and causing anxiety, but it seemed like everywhere I turned, someone was facing true crisis. Missionary friends across the world discovering their son (the same age as our Peter) has had a recurrence of his cancer. A friend's dad undergoing testing for what could be serious medical issues. And on and on.

Then the day itself was "one of those days" at our house. Mom wasn't feeling well, the kids were all out of sorts, everyone was behind...not a good day all around. On the one hand, I kept reminding myself that the little irritations and stressors in my life were nothing compared to so many others. On the other...it might have all been pretty minor, but it was miserable nonetheless.

And yet all day, God kept reminding me of His sovereignty...that no matter what it *seems* like when I look at things going on around me, God is in complete control, none of it has come as a surprise to Him, and He has a plan, for good and not for evil, for a hope and a future...in each and every instance.

As I was pondering this post this morning, I realized that while I may feel "scattered and smothered", actually "scattered, smothered, and covered" would apply. "He will cover you with his feathers, and under his wings you will find refuge; his faithfulness will be your shield and rampart." (Psalm 91:4) He is sovereign over all, and He covers us with His feathers.

Even since the time I originally started this post early this morning, today has spun a bit out of control. Nothing major, just one of those, "Really? Now?" happenings that come along just in time to unravel carefully laid plans. Just in the last hour or so, I've had to remind myself, "This, too, came as no surprise to God. His plans are perfect...even when it's hard for us to see them that way."

Whether the day is filled with "normal craziness", serious crisis, or peaceful calm, I'm so thankful for His constant reminders of His sovereignty and faithfulness. I am thankful that things are not just spinning crazily out of control as they sometimes feel, but that everything that happens is part of His perfect plan, and He is in total control of it all.

Are not two sparrows sold for a penny? And not one of them will fall to the ground apart from your Father. But even the hairs of your head are all numbered. Fear not, therefore you are of more value than many sparrows.

~Matthew 10:29-31

30 Days of Gratitude ~ Day 2 (A Day Late...:))

2011-11-03T11:58:00.002-05:00

Day 2 ~ Choir!! (Especially at Christmas...:)) I had planned to post this last night when I got home, but after back-to-back Christmas rehearsals (children's and adult), I was wiped out. For all the hard work and chaos, though, I wouldn't have it any other way.

I have loved everything about choir since I started preschool choir at FBC, Conway almost 40 years ago. I have wonderful memories of preschool/children's choirs there...especially wonderful choir teachers like Neva Hayley, Shirley McCone, Betty Courtway, Janis Banister, and others.

I also have wonderful memories of the adult choir at FBC...both as a child listening, and as a youth singing. How could anyone who grew up under the music ministry of Don Bingham NOT develop a love of all things choir?? :) Learning to sing alto from Myrtle Lee Selig, Cynthia Lamberson, and Wanda Landers...the basses on the back row (led by my dad, with help from Bill Taylor, Bill Bounds, and Ed Eason, if memory serves correctly :)) pestering the daylights out of me during Wednesday night choir practice...amazing soloists including Janis Banister, Donna Gober, Susan Baker, the Wards, and Bro. Roy, with Suzy Ward at the piano...LOTS of good memories there.

Then there was Woodland Heights. I remember so vividly meeting at Donna Gober's house, before we were ever constituted as a church, practicing choir music around her piano...people perched and sprawled and standing in every available spot. We had amazing music before we ever had a building. :) Our beloved Bro. Roy, and then later Kathy Williford, who was an amazing musician and teacher, were two (among others) who led the choir during my years there. One of my best choir memories ever is singing "We've Come This Far By Faith" in a brand new church that had already seen God work in mighty ways. Still brings goosebumps to think about it. :)

When I moved to Fort Smith and joined Grand Avenue (where my grandmother was a member at the time), I had the interesting experience of singing alto in the midst of a group of ladies who had known my parents, my aunts, and my grandparents for something like 50 years. Not only did I have another great church music experience under the ministry of Keith Clutts, but I also got to hear lots of fun stories about my family in the "olden days". :) Another of my "best choir memories ever" was participating in the musical "God With Us" at Grand Avenue. Not only was it an incredibly beautiful worship experience, but God used the music in a mighty way during that time.

It would take a book to begin to share all the "tremendous" (sorry...inside reference for OCBC folks...:)) choir memories since we've been at Oak Cliff, but here are a few that stick out:

*All the things we've learned from Lyndel (about music, about worship, about God)...

* The worship experience every week (not just in the Sunday service, but in Wednesday night rehearsals as well)...

* Years of musicals (especially Keyboards at Christmas the last few years!)...

* Working with Kathy in children's choir (oh, the stories...and they go on and on! ;-))...

* Children's choir musicals (which I love even though I tend to be a bit grumpy about them at times...:-))...

* My dad (especially those last few years when it was so hard for him to keep going, but he loved it so much that he kept going anyway)...

* December 9, 2004...A crowd of choir members appearing at the hospital after Christmas musical dress rehearsal the night Daddy died (they aren't just a choir...they're family)...

* The intense emotion and deepened meaning as I sang in that musical three days later...

* The choir singing "When I Survey the Wondrous Cross" at Daddy's funeral (amid the musical sets from the night before, which was so completely appropriate! :))...

* "Lyndel is a friendel"...Katie's hilariously perfect arrangement to the tune of "76 Trombones" for Lyndel's 20th (25th? I can't remember now) anniversary, and the "secret choir" rehearsal at Carl and Frances's to prepare it....

* Lucy. Choir will never be the same without her and other faithful choir members who made such an impact on us and who are singing praises at the feet of Jesus now.

* And most of all the music...music that God uses on a regular basis to work deeply in my life...there's no way to begin to express it all. (There are probably more posts on this blog about choir music than any other single topic!)

I know I've left out something or someone vitally important. This was going to be a really short post...but once I got started, the memories began to flood. (And I left out a bunch!) And we're still making them! Emlyn's hard at work on her part for the children's Christmas musical, and last night when I wrote "Harris" on a new piece of music (as I usually do), I realized that there are now three "Harrises" in the choir...it's been such a treat to have my two oldest prepping Christmas music with us!

I am so thankful for all the ways that God has used church choir(s) through the years to bless me in so many ways!

Keyboards at Christmas Dress Rehearsal, 2010

30 Days of Gratitude ~ Day 1

2011-11-01T23:44:00.000-05:00

It really shouldn't have come as any surprise. Yesterday I posted that today would kick off "30 Days of Gratitude" here on the blog. I had all kinds of plans for today's post, and then had one of "those" days today. We kept plugging, managed to get {most of} school done, and survived the day, but somehow now it's an hour and a half past the newish bedtime I'm trying to impose upon myself and I still haven't managed to type out a blog post.

The post I planned for today will have to wait. My eyelids are sagging worse than usual, and my brain shut down a couple of hours ago, I think.

I will say that the kids and I did get a good start on our "30 Days of Gratitude" project during (and after) school. They started gratitude lapbooks today, with Daddy even getting in on the artistic end of things. Hopefully I'll be able to post a picture or two tomorrow. They'll work on these books throughout the month.

Tonight I'll kick off my "30 Days" posts here very simply. I'm thankful for my salvation. I'm thankful that even though there was nothing lovely or desirable or redeeming about me, God chose me. He loved me enough to send His Son to save me through His death on the cross and His resurrection 3 days later from the grave. In our Reformation Day study this week, we've been talking again about the fact that there is nothing we can do to "earn" salvation...that salvation is by grace through faith in Jesus Christ alone. I'm thankful for His grace. I'm thankful that nothing can pluck me out of His hand. I'm thankful that even on days when I'm tired and frustrated and ready to move to Australia, He doesn't change, and neither does my security in Him.

"For it is by free grace (God's unmerited favor) that you are saved (delivered from judgment and made partakers of Christ's salvation) through [your] faith. And this [salvation] is not of yourselves [of your own doing, it came not through your own striving], but it is the gift of God;

"Not because of works [not the fulfillment of the Law's demands], lest any man should boast. [It is not the result of what anyone can possibly do, so no one can pride himself in it or take glory to himself.]

"For we are God's [own] handiwork (His workmanship), recreated in Christ Jesus, [born anew] that we may do those good works which God predestined (planned beforehand) for us [taking paths which He prepared ahead of time], that we should walk in them [living the good life which He prearranged and made ready for us to live]." ~ Ephesians 2:8-10 AMP

~ ~ ~ ~ ~

"Every good gift and every perfect (free, large, full) gift is from above; it comes down from the Father of all [that gives] light, in [the shining of] Whom there can be no variation [rising or setting] or shadow cast by His turning [as in an eclipse].

"And it was of His own [free] will that He gave us birth [as sons] by [His] Word of Truth, so that we should be a kind of firstfruits of His creatures [a sample of what He created to be consecrated to Himself]. ~ James 1:17-18

~ ~ ~ ~ ~

What are you thankful for today? I'd love for you to join me in this gratitude project. Leave a comment telling what you are thankful for today, or post on your blog and link back here.

Multitude Monday ~ October 31 Then and Now, and a Month of Gratitude...

2011-11-01T01:05:00.001-05:00

I hate Halloween. Yes, hate is a strong word, but I do...I hate Halloween. I have always hated Halloween, ever since I was a little girl. I'm fairly sure this is the Halloween I was two...my Granny Marks made this adorable pumpkin costume for her first (and at that time, only) grandchild, and my parents and grandparents dutifully took me "Trick or Treating". (Notice the rick-rack and the applique...I think my love of these things may have begun with this creation. :)) I couldn't find the photo I originally set out looking for...taken in the entry hall of the house in which we currently live (then Granny and Papa Marks's house). I remember vividly leaving their house and heading up the street in search of treats from the neighbors, then primarily older people who'd lived in the neighborhood and been friends of my grandparents for years. I was terrified. There were bigger children in scary costumes, and I wasn't thrilled about being dressed up myself. I didn't want to go door to door (I still detest any sort of door-to-door endeavor), and even the candy didn't make all the hubbub worth it.

This picture was taken later that night, at Granny Kitty and Grandpa Brown's house. We made the familiar drive across town to see my other grandparents and *their* neighbors...same story, different street...although I don't remember the Trick or Treaters in that neighborhood being quite so scary. Of course, I don't remember much about the evening by that point...that appears to be Aunt Sis sitting in Papaw's chair, but I don't remember her being there at all. I think I was a bit shell-shocked by that point. :)

And all these many years later, and all the years in between, I still have no use for Halloween. Even before I discovered the questionable nature of Halloween, I had no real desire to participate. If you want to dress up and get candy, have a costume party with a candy buffet. :) I'm not thrilled with the scary side of Halloween, there is nothing pretty about it, and there are way too many safety issues for my comfort. There are just way too many other things I'd rather spend time and money celebrating. I suppose I'm the Ebenezer Scrooge of Halloween. Bah! Humbug! ;-)

However, I LOVE Reformation Day. It is rich with history and drama and heroes of the faith and even great hymns. We kicked off a week-long Reformation Day study today and enjoyed every minute of it. Here's my Facebook status from this afternoon...

"Kick-off to our week-long Reformation Day study, great discussion with the kids about Martin Luther, vocabulary and figurative language from "A Mighty Fortress is our God"...today has been one of those days when I really love being a homeschooling mom. Days like these are the days that keep me going during the "I'm going to rip all of my hair out" days...:)"

(I'm sure I'm the only homeschooling mom around who has those "I'm going to rip all of my hair out" days. Just "keeping it real" here...:-/)

And I love Thanksgiving. Really and truly, Thanksgiving may be my very favorite holiday. I do love Christmas, and Easter is very special, and New Year's is near the top of my list (both because I love the whole "new year planning and goal setting thing, and because New Year's Eve is my birthday :)), but I LOVE Thanksgiving.

I realized today that November 1 may actually be one of my favorite days of the year. We finally have the much-detested (at least by me) ordeal of Halloween behind us, and the holiday season begins in earnest as we begin preparing for Thanksgiving and Christmas.

This year I'm especially excited about November. First...Billy is on vacation for almost two weeks this month. We are looking forward to our vacation tremendously...both the fun "R and R" part and the productive "get a lot done" part.

Second...the kids and I plan to kick off "30 Days of Gratefulness" on November 1. Part school unit, part "life", we have (well, mostly *I* have...a lot of it will be a surprise to them :)) all kinds of activities planned to help us get into "gratefulness mode" this month. (We're going to let Dad in on some of it, too...:)) We've all struggled with this in various ways lately, and it's really time that we get down to the business of serious gratefulness.

Along with that, I'm planning to do a month-long "30 Days of Gratefulness" series here on the blog. Yes, my plan is to do 30 straight days of posts on the subject of gratefulness. Some may be reports on what we are doing as a family for our 30 Days of Gratefulness project. Some may be posts on my own gratefulness journey this month...as I've been planning this, I realize I need it probably the most of anyone. Some may simply be posts of things I'm thankful for along the way. I have some loose plans in the works, but nothing set in stone yet.

This post is already way too long, and I still have my Multitude Monday list to post, so...more on the subject of gratefulness and what God is doing in my life in that area right now tomorrow. Hopefully I'll also have a chance to throw in a few details about our Reformation Day study tomorrow, too. Until then, continuing the gifts...

61 ~ The opportunity to homeschool...on the good days and the "pull my hair out" days...and the things God is teaching me through it...even more than what He is teaching my children...

62 ~ My hard-working, long-suffering, always-giving husband...

63 ~ October 31 cookout...as I said on FB tonight..."Perfect way to end the day...good friends, crackling fire, roasted hot dogs and s'mores, wide open spaces, flashlights and night vision goggles flashing in the darkness, laughter echoing across the field...made even Kaitlyn's fake spiders, Mad Madison brandishing the hoe, and the flying, flaming paper plates that threatened to incinerate Kathy and I all worth it. :D" So thankful for campfire food and good fellowship and time to just relax and enjoy beautiful fall weather by firelight...

64 ~ Reformation Day reminders of those who've gone before, whose faithfulness and courage inspires and challenges us in so many ways...

65 ~ Hymns...always the hymns. "O, the Deep, Deep Love of Jesus"...long time favorite that Katie played so beautifully Sunday morning...worship at its glorious best! "A Mighty Fortress is Our God"...Battle Hymn of the Reformation...loving the study we are doing of it this week!

66~ Things to look forward to with anticipation...vacation this month, the opportunity to serve at GBC's Thanksgiving Meal, Children's Christmas musical only a few {too-short!} weeks away, and 100th birthday celebration for a faithful lady closing out the month...

67 ~ The boy's birthday, only a month away! How can I have been a mom for almost 14 years? He's growing in wisdom and stature so quickly...

68 ~ Still enjoying the unseasonably mild weather around here...praying for a mild winter this year!

69 ~ My youth Sunday School girls! God blesses me every week, through the lessons I teach and am taught by, and through these girls who are so unique and so precious. Love every one of them! And so blessed to be in a place where I have no doubt I am doing what I am called to do...

70 ~ Real life heroes who help and encourage and inspire and challenge...

71 ~ Psalm 46, the ways God keeps bringing it across my path lately, and the things He is teaching me from it...

Only remotely decent photo of a child I managed to get all evening...:)

Food on Friday...Hit it Out of the Park Chicken and Rice :)

2011-10-28T05:00:00.000-05:00

When our oven went out several months ago, we decided that we would hold off on repairing/replacing it for the moment and just "do without" for a while. We were headed into the heat of summer (when we don't use the oven anyway in our un-airconditioned kitchen), and we're in a state of decision-making at the moment as to our future plans for this house (putting any serious financial outlays on hold for the time being). Besides...with a stove, an electric skillet, two crock pots, an electric roaster, a microwave, a toaster oven (provided by a friend :)), a bread machine (which I haven't used in a while but plan to pull out soon), and a "Kitchen Kettle multi-cooker/steamer/deep fryer", who is really going to miss an oven?

Well, I do miss the oven, just a bit. Although we *have* finally figured out a way to cook frozen pizzas (oddly enough, one of the things that my children miss most about not having an oven...go figure...:)), and we've learned that you can, in a pinch, bake cookies in a toaster oven, I miss being able to throw a casserole in a Pyrex an hour before supper or pop a batch of muffins in the oven for breakfast.

However, for the most part, it's been fine. We're trying new recipes and getting more creative in the kitchen, which is always a good thing. And we are learning that there are lots of alternatives to cooking in the oven.

We've tried a few new things already, and I have a file full of ideas ready to try. In the interest of motivating myself to actually turn those ideas into food on the table, I've decided that I am going to start a new feature here on the blog..."Oven-Free Fridays". I'll be chronicling some of our successes (and probably a few failures along the way) in oven-free cooking. I'm even considering trying my hand at creating a nifty little "Oven-Free Fridays" button. :)

And for "Oven Free Fridays" debut recipe..."Hit it Out of the Park Chicken". My crock pot has always been a trusty friend in the kitchen, but it is getting even more of a workout these days. I've been scouring on-line crock pot sites for ideas and come up with a list I want to try. I'm hoping to attempt crock pot banana bread today (I'm skeptical, but an urgent early-fall craving for banana bread is convincing me to give it a try), and I plan to try out crock pot brownies later in the week.

Tuesday, though, my crock pot project was totally spur of the moment. Rather than poring through the file of recipes I have saved, I was sneaking a quick peek at Pinterest in between activities, and I happened upon this recipe. I realized that I had all the ingredients, I hadn't planned supper yet, and I needed a quick, easy meal because I needed to get out the door right after supper.

So...I tossed the cream cheese, cream of chicken soup, Italian dressing mix, and frozen chicken breasts in the crock pot and set it to high. I didn't even stir the sauce ingredients up in advance like the recipe suggests. (I did stir them well after it had cooked for a bit, though.)

YUM. The original recipe calls this "crock pot chicken and rice". We've decided to rename it "Hit it Out of the Park Chicken", because it was definitely a home run at our house (and I have too many "chicken and rice" recipes already. :)) Even one of my very picky children, who had originally said, "I don't want any of that chicken stuff, Mom...I'm not eating that," came back later (after I insisted on a thankful bite :)), and said rather meekly, "You were right, Mom, that chicken stuff is really good!"

I LOVE super-easy crock pot recipes that end up being just impossibly better than the sum of their simple ingredients. Saloon beef is one of our favorites that fits those criteria...it just doesn't seem possible that something that easy can be so amazingly good. This recipe is another of those. When I threw it in the crock pot, I was just hoping for simple and edible busy day food. It turned out to be fabulous! It's rare that all six members of our family really love something...but everyone raved about this one. I'm looking forward to making it often this winter...definitely comfort food at it's best.

The original recipe can be found here. Here's what I ended up doing:

Hit it Out of the Park Chicken

8 ounces cream cheese, softened

1 can cream of chicken soup

1 package Italian dressing mix

5 large boneless, skinless chicken breasts

Other than thawing the chicken breasts a bit in the microwave because I realized I was pressed for time to get them fully cooked before I had to be out the door that evening, I just dumped it all in the crock pot and turned it on high. About 30 minutes later, I stirred the sauce ingredients together. It cooked on high about 4.5 hours, I think...until the chicken was done/tender. I shredded the chicken (in a very coarse shred, because I was running late )), and served with rice. The original recipe said to mix it with the cooked rice, but with my bunch, I decided it was safer to serve it on the side. :) It would also have been really good over noodles.

YUM.

I'd love to hear your favorite "oven-free" recipes...just leave me a comment with a link or recipe!

(Joining up with Ann Kroeker today for Food on Fridays...be sure to check out the rest of her blog while you're there!)

Wordless Wednesday ~ Girls at the River

2011-10-26T11:31:00.001-05:00

Linking up with Wordless Wednesday today...

In "Other" Words ~ Loving the Unloving

2011-10-25T11:16:00.002-05:00

It seems like I say it at least 3 times a day some days..."It's not hard to be kind to your siblings when they are being nice to you...it's being nice to your siblings when they aren't being nice to you that counts."

Some days, they do well with that...others, I find myself thinking "Will this EVER sink in?"

And then I realize that God could say the same about me. He keeps teaching...and I keep resolving to do better...and then the neighbors do something annoying, or someone pulls out in front of me during traffic, or...or...or...

And I am reminded that one of the best ways for my children to learn this is to see it in me. Ouch.

Bro. Kent has been preaching from Romans 12:9-10 the last couple of Sundays. Here are a few snippets from my notes...

* God calls every believer to a Spirit-led life built on the foundation of love. We are to be

characterized by love.

* Agape love, focusing selflessly on the beloved...as opposed to the "norm" in our culture,

which seems to be, "I will love you as long as you make me happy and meet my needs."

(That kind of "love" actually selfishness masquerading as love...)

* Agape loves whether the beloved can make you happy or not...We could NEVER meet

God's needs or make Him happy...He needs NOTHING, and is totally self-sufficient.

* They don't deserve our love, but neither do we deserve Jesus's love...we are called to

love them as He loves us.

* Jesus Himself said that they will know we are Christians NOT because we call ourselves

Christians, but because we love one another.

Loving the unlovely isn't easy. As Bro. Kent said Sunday morning, we have to crucify our pride every moment of every day in order to do this. BUT...as he also reminded us Sunday, it is God's will for us to do this, and therefore when we pray that He will make us able to love and honor others as He commands, we can be confident that He will give us the grace and the power to do it. I realize that too often, I don't even ask.

"If you love those who love you, what benefit is that to you? For even sinners love those who love them. And if you do good to those who do good to you, what benefit is that to you? For even sinners do the same. And if you lend to those from whom you expect to receive, what credit is that to you? Even sinners lend to sinners, to get back the same amount. But love your enemies, and do good, and lend, expecting nothing in return, and your reward will be great, and you will be sons of the Most High, for he is kind to the ungrateful and the evil. Be merciful, even as your Father is merciful. ~ Luke 6:32-36

Living for God is our host this week for In "Other" Words Tuesday. Thanks to her for hosting and for selecting this week's quote. Please visit her blog to see what others are sharing about this quote today.

Multitude Monday ~ Journaling the Gifts...

2011-10-24T20:27:00.003-05:00

Joining with Ann in journaling the gifts...

51 ~ "Sermons that stick" and the things God teaches me through them...

52 ~ An abundance of free books downloaded this morning...classics of the faith, children's classics, schoolbooks, great biographies, history, etc....

53 ~ Military friend home briefly from deployment, and the sacrifices his family and so many others make for our freedom...

54 ~ Fellowship with friends at church yesterday...

55 ~ Children singing as they work...

56 ~ Their silliness that brings so much laughter...

57 ~ "Lawn Chair Dates" in the cooling air...

58 ~ Phone calls that are welcome interruptions to my day...

59 ~ "Just the right pen" to pen the thanks...

60 ~ Isaiah 65: 17...

Woodpeckers!

2011-10-21T23:31:00.000-05:00

I have always been fascinated by woodpeckers. We've had several varieties in our yard this year, but only recently have I been able to get an occasional shot...

Downy Woodpecker

Red-Bellied Woodpecker

Candlelight S'mores

2011-10-19T05:30:00.000-05:00

Joining in today with Wordless Wednesday at 5 Minutes for Mom.

In "Other" Words..."Stay thy heart..."

2011-10-17T23:23:00.000-05:00

“ When you have no helpers, see your helpers in God.
When you have many helpers, see God in all your helpers.
When you have nothing but God, see all in God.
When you have everything, see God in everything.
Under all conditions, stay thy heart only on the Lord. ”

~ Charles Spurgeon

I ran across this quote a while back and immediately thought, "This is one of those quotes I need to write on the palm of my hand in permanent ink so that I can see it every day." :) That last line pretty much sums up one of the main lessons God has been teaching me recently..."Under all conditions, stay thy heart only on the Lord." We did an in-depth study this summer on Colossians 3:1-17, with the theme "Heads Up!"...reminding us to "seek the things that are above". And ever since then, in the Sunday School lessons I teach every week, and other things I hear and see from day to day, God continues to remind me that I am to be seeking Him with all my heart...always...no matter what the circumstances.

"When you have no helpers, see your helpers in God." ~ I hear so often of people going through serious difficulties with virtually no earthly support. I struggle sometimes with feeling almost guilty because we have, through all the storms of the past 7+ years, had many "helpers". I've said, "I don't know how people manage during times of crisis without friends like ours and a church family that truly is a family." We've been blessed that our experiences with that have been rare to the point of almost non-existent.

And yet...in other ways, we have experienced that aloneness. When our world exploded in 2006, we knew no one who had been through the experience our family suddenly found itself dealing with. For various reasons, we could tell no one during those early days but a tiny circle of friends, fewer than the fingers on our hands. They were wonderfully supportive...have been throughout...and I have no idea how we would have made it without them. But as wonderful as they are, and as big a blessing as they have been...they hadn't walked our road. There were days when I begged God to send someone who truly understood, someone who could say, "Yes, we've been there, and this is how we handled this or that", someone who could counsel with a voice of experience.

God in His perfect wisdom had other plans. He began to show me that He wanted to be our "Wonderful Counselor." He wanted us to learn to depend completely on Him. He wanted to show us that He was truly all that we needed. He wanted to be our Helper.

"When you have many helpers, see God in all your helpers." ~ I said that I've struggled sometimes with feeling almost guilty because we've had so many helpers, when others go through similar situations feeling quite alone. And as I said, there were times when we felt totally alone in some ways. And yet we've had so many helpers who have been so precious. We've had people who have prayed faithfully, people who have brought meals, people who have helped in so many ways. We've had friends who have stood by us, wept with us, made us laugh, slogged through the trenches with us, and when we came to the point that we couldn't go any farther, carried us to Jesus.

Those people have been the hands and feet of Jesus to us. We have seen God work in amazing ways to bring just the right people across our path at just the right time. We've seen friends listen to a still, small prompting and meet a need in just the right way. God has been our Rock and Fortress...but He has used many people to do His work in our lives, and I am so thankful for each one.

"When you have nothing but God, see all in God." ~ I think sometimes this one is the easy one. When we hit the very bottom, it is sometimes easier to realize that God is not only all we have, He is also all we need. He has proven that to us time after time in these years. And when we are clinging to Him most closely, He is truly all that we can see. All else is crowded from our field of vision by Him.

"When you have everything, see God in everything." ~ This, I think, may be the hardest of all. When things are good, it would seem we would be the most thankful, the most focused on Him, because the storms aren't there to distract us. And yet, for me, it doesn't work that way. For over a year now, things have been {relatively :)} calm here. We have begun to adjust, for now anyway, to a "new normal". And yet the less "desperate" our situation has been, the easier it has been to turn my gaze in other directions, to release my hold on Him just a bit, to let the world begin to crowd in. It seems that "learning to see God in everything" in the good times has to be a more intentional, conscious decision, rather than the natural response borne of desperation in the hard times.

Under all conditions, stay thy heart only on the Lord. ~ That's pretty much what it all boils down to. No matter what, seek the Lord with all your heart. It sounds so easy...but it is so hard sometimes to truly do. And yet what a difference when our hearts are completely stayed on Him. Then we can say with Paul...

"Not that I am speaking of being in need, for I have learned in whatever situation I am to be content. I know how to be brought low, and I know how to abound. In any and every circumstance, I have learned the secret of facing plenty and hunger, abundance and need. I can do all things through Him who strengthens me." ~Philippians 4:11-13

Thank you for joining me for this week's In Other Words! To participate, share your thoughts on the above quote on your blog, and then come back here and add the direct link to your post. Then visit others who have shared on the quote this week. I'm looking forward to reading what others have to share!

Multitude Monday...The Music and the Gifts...

2011-10-17T12:06:00.000-05:00

"You need a pencil..." We hear those words often in choir rehearsal. Most often, so that Lyndel can tell us all the places we aren't supposed to breathe, and the few select places we are. :) (I sometimes have the urge to write "Turn blue in the face here..." ;-)) Occasionally to change a word, due to doctrinal or other issues, and otherwise usually to emphasize dynamic markings or point out the proper pronunciation of a a particular word or syllable ("Remember it's yewr, not yore!" "Mark it...it's hallelu-YAH, not hallelu-YUH.")

Occasionally I'll run across a piece of music that still has my dad's name in his distinctively familiar hand on the front. I always grab it...it's a crazy thing, I know, but there is something comforting, even after all these years, about singing with a piece of music I know my dad sang from years ago. It's been over seven years now since he sang in choir...over seven years since he was last able to haltingly walk into church. It really doesn't seem possible that it's been nearly that long...and then in some ways, it seems like it's been a lifetime. With all that's gone on since, there are times that those days truly seem like another life altogether.

After all these years, those pieces of music with Daddy's name on the front are pretty few and far between. Most of them have been erased by now, many replaced with another penciled name. I'm not sure why, but I'm bad about not putting my name on my music...so I tend to grab a "no-name" piece. (And yes, that is actually what we call them...as people gather their music, it's common to hear "I need a no-name, please!" For some reason that still strikes me as funny every once in a while. :))

Daddy's name may have been erased off the fronts of most of his music, but there are still lots of older pieces that have his neatly-penciled (or sometimes hastily scrawled) notes *inside*. In the earlier months after he died, opening one of those pieces in the middle of rehearsal tended to cause the "someone just hit me in the stomach" feeling. It was somehow different to be caught off-guard by his handwriting in the middle than to see his name on the front and intentionally select it. I fought ill-timed tears more than once, particularly when his notes were more than just a word here and there. Now, though, they make me smile...and more than once they've been a comfort or encouragement in a rather odd way at a specific time. Yesterday was one of those times. :)

The last couple of weeks I've missed my dad more than I have in a long time. This time of year always reminds me of him...both because he loved fall so much, and because that fall seven years ago was so intense with his decline and the realization that we were near the end. But I'm still not sure why the "I miss my Daddy" meter has been so high these weeks. Part of it, I'm sure, has been the activities that I knew he would have enjoyed so much...the fair, the air show, helping Peter with his wood-working projects, etc.

Daddy as Noah, WHBC Noah's Ark party, 198?

And part of it, I imagine, is that I've struggled with discouragement in a lot of areas in the past few weeks. And for almost 36 years, my dad was my greatest encourager in times of discouragement. :) I've felt that void even more than usual lately.

So, yesterday. :) I'd just come from teaching a Sunday School lesson on Jesus giving hope no matter what the circumstances, a lesson I realized I needed to hear myself as much as I needed to teach. I walked into the choir room, grabbed some music, and put my folder together as we began to rehearse. I turned a page, and there they were...tiny penciled letters that told me my dad had once sung these very same words from this very same paper. I smiled even as my voice wobbled a tiny bit...it wasn't quite a hug or a phone call, but it was something.

A little while later, singing the same words from the same paper with the same penciled letters, I was suddenly overwhelmed...not just by the penciled markings themselves, but by the actual words we were singing..

"At the name of Jesus, at the name of Jesus,
Every knee shall bow in Heaven and in earth.
That every knee shall bow and every tongue shall confess
That Jesus Christ is Lord!"
(Cindy Berry)

My dad sang those words, many times. And now He is in Heaven, bowing before the Father and confessing that Jesus is Lord face to face. The hope that we sing of in those words is now reality to him. He loved so much to worship through song here, especially in choir...but that worship here is like seeing through a mirror dimly compared to the worship He is doing there...seeing face to face.

Daddy went through some very dark days on earth. Job issues, church issues, health issues...all kinds of health issues, from strokes to blindness to cancer. And yet all of those things are as a vapor now...no more sorrow, no more tears...ever! And even so, all the pain and frustration and anxiety and sadness that we are experiencing now...it, too, will eventually be as a vapor as well, as we are able to worship Him face to face. What an encouraging thought!

I didn't ask for a hug or a phone call from my dad this week...I knew that wasn't possible. But God used Daddy's long-ago pencil scratches to encourage me almost as if he were still here telling me himself. I think that encouragement...from my earthly dad and my Heavenly Father...is a good place to start this week's Multitude Monday list...

~ Long-ago pencil marks in music, reminding me of God's faithfulness and certain hope....
~ Daddy's heritage in the area of church music...singing in choir, directing handbells, serving as choir librarian, and more...
~ Three generations of our family rehearsing Christmas music together this year...what a blessing to have my two "youth" in the choir!
~ Reminders again of the blessing of quality, God-honoring music in our corporate worship at church...
~ Being reminded that these days, for a Christian, are the *worst* days ever...the best is yet to come, and will last forever!
~ Clearer mind and stronger body this week...step by small step...
~ Unseasonably mild weather...such a blessing after the extremes of the winter, spring, and fall...
~ Daily provision...
~ My husband and children always...
~ His faithfulness always, even when I realize the depths of my own unfaithfulness...
~ His mercies which are new every morning...

Yumm! :)

2011-10-16T21:25:00.000-05:00

I've been planning to make these ever since I ran across the link on Pinterest a while back...and finally made them in honor of Sweetest Day yesterday. I just about trashed the whole batch...during the second freezing, I opened the freezer door and the whole tray fell out! About half of them were unsalvageable, and the other half didn't end up being as pretty as they started out...but they were worth it! They got rave reviews from Billy *and* the kids, and we are planning to make another batch this week (hopefully a *full* batch!)..

We decided "Chocolate Peanut Butter Sandwiches from Disneyland" was a bit cumbersome as a name, so we're just calling them Disney Bars. :) A few observations, should you decide to make them:

1. I usually buy generic brand graham crackers, but decided to get the Honey Maid brand from Sam's for these, with the thought that they wouldn't crumble as badly as the generics, and would break in half more evenly. Umm, no. They actually crumbled worse than the generics I usually use. Lesson learned. :)

2. They are *really* rich. I used squares (half graham crackers) for this batch, but for the next batch we'll use fourths (small rectangles). The squares were just too much.

3. Be *really* careful getting the trays in and out of the freezer. If you drop one and half the batch lands in the floor over halfway through, it won't be pretty.

4. Make sure you have plenty of milk on hand. These need milk. They insist on it. :)

Enjoy!

I just realized that I altered the recipe a bit...here is my version (and I don't measure, so I'll try to guesstimate where I can) :

Disney Bars

Dipping Chocolate (I used half a package of this, for one sleeve of graham crackers.)

Graham Crackers (one sleeve, halved)

Peanut Butter

I melted the chocolate in the microwave per the directions on the package, then dipped the graham crackers and froze until solid. Spread with a thin layer of peanut butter, freeze again, then cover the top and sides with another layer of melted chocolate. Freeze until ready to serve. Serve with milk. Yum!